Gently, he pulled me over so I was sitting next to him. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer to his side. I snuggled up close, and again offered no resistance when he cupped my breast and began twisting my nipple, in fact, I moved even closer and rested my head on his shoulder.

For quite some time there was only silence while he touched my chest through my shirt and bra. "What a wonderful touch," I thought, and I felt the gnawing feeling between my legs due to the persistent tit play. He seemed to sense that I was now under his control, and leaned his mouth to my ear and whispered, "Take it out of my pants, now!"

Growing more excited, my shaking hands fumbled with the belt and zipper of his jeans. Finally getting them loose, I slid my hand inside only to discover he wasn’t wearing any under wear! Reaching farther down my fingers encountered the largest cock I had ever felt! My pussy lurched as I wrapped my hand around the massive organ. My breathing became shallow as I tried to fish the monster out of its cotton prison. His penis felt alive in my hand, and I had an overwhelming desire to put it in my mouth, the only problem was that I couldn't get it out! He sensed my frustration; chuckled and reached down to help me.

When it finally came out, I let out a groan at the sheer sight of his organ! Without another word, I dropped my head into his lap and let the head slip into my mouth. Overcome with desire, my head bobbed up and down on the stiff shaft. Every few seconds he would urge me on with the words, "Suck it, suck it!!!" Being only too happy to oblige, I strained to get as much of it into my mouth as possible. It only took a few minutes until he was blowing it into my hot mouth! I moaned when the cum jetted into my throat, and I struggled to swallow it all down. Even after he had cum, I didn’t want to let it out of my mouth. Finally he pulled me away and turned and kissed me full on the mouth, again causing my pussy to throb.

Looking me in the eye, he said, "Lay down on the bed!"

"Let me have your cock again….please," I implored.

Pulling me to my feet, he asked, "Would you do anything to have my cock?"

"Yes, yes, anything," I begged, "just let me have it, please!"

Letting me go I was right at his groin, pulling it out to my eager mouth. This time, he didn't want to cum in my mouth, he wanted it in my pussy.


Pulling me to my feet he ordered me to strip. Lying back on the bed, he watched as I removed all of my clothing.



Seeing the big pecker erect on his stomach, I leaned down and tried to put it back in my mouth, but he just pushed me away and laughed.

"So you want some more of it," he asked, as he took it in his hand and gave it a few quick jerks?

I reached for it again and said, "Please let me have it!"

Shaking his head no, he offered, "Sit on it for a while and I’ll let you suck afterwards!"

I practically leaped on top of him, begging him to stick it in me. Positioning myself just right, the big dick slowly entered my tight little cunt. I lowered my cunt inch by inch until the whole monster was buried deep inside of me. My excitement was now turning into delirium! In my whole life I had never felt so full of cock! My ass rocked back and forth, packing the big pecker deeper into my straining slit. Even though we were hardly even moving, I was wracked with a cunt wrenching orgasm, my pussy convulsing around the big stud that was deep in my vagina. He pulled me down so my nipples rested on his chest. He reached around my back, held me tight, and with one quick motion rolled me over onto my back, leaving him on top of me.

"Now I’m going to show you what a real fuck is," he hissed through clenched teeth!

Slowly at first he moved his penis in and out of my tight vagina, gradually picking up speed until he was literally pounding me into submission! I groaned in ecstasy as my pussy was being ravaged by the massive intruder!

As he fucked me, he whispered into my ear, "You’re mine now, whenever I call, you see me, do you understand me!"

Barely able to speak, I shuddered back, "Whenever you call, I’ll......Oh God," I cried out, "I’m fucking cumming so fucking hard!!!"

His penis was now almost a blur diving in and out of my pussy. Hearing me scream out, sent him over the edge and both of us climaxed like animals in heat! Collapsing on my chest, he struggled to regain his breath, finally rolling off me, both of us panting like over heated dogs.

Ever since I can remember, I've been of the firm opinion that the key to giving great head lies in a person's attitude, not raw technique.

The first time that I gave head, I certainly didn't have much of a technique. But my enthusiasm and attentiveness to my then-lover's reactions easily made up for my inexperience. I have retained that attitude about giving head over the years, thus giving me the opportunity and motivation to develop my technique. I'm now quite pleased to regard giving great head as one of my many talents.

Yes, really, I love giving head. I love slowly kissing down a man's side, torturing him with the knowledge of what I am going to do with him. I love the feel of his cock in my hand as I slowly lick the head. I love taking his cock into my mouth, rolling my tongue over the head, licking and sucking every inch of it. I love the feel of a man's hand gently resting in my hair and the sound of his breathing as I bring him closer to orgasm. I love making him explode in pleasure in my mouth and swallowing every drop of cum.

For me, giving head isn't my duty as a lover. It isn't about selflessly giving myself to my lover. I don't believe in duty or selfless giving, particularly not in sex.

It is my own selfish pleasure and desire that motivates me. It is my desire for complete control over my lover's pleasure, to be the one to drive him to the heights of sensuous feeling. I want him to ache for the feel of my warm, wet mouth wrapped around his cock.

But I want more than control. Giving head is a way for me to make all my abstract feelings about my lover concrete. I don't just suck his cock; I make love to it. Every pleasure that I give with my lips, my tongue, my hands is the ultimate expression of emotions ranging from pure lust to passion.

This pleasure that I get out of the control and expression aspects of giving head serve a higher purpose, namely a reminder of my nature as a highly sexual creature. It is an acknowledgement to myself that I'm a sexy, sensual person. Knowing that I have the capacity to drive a man wild with the touch of my lips and tongue on his cock gives me an amazing feeling of sexual power. I love it. In order to get this sort of purely selfish pleasure out of giving head, a person has got to already have a sense of their own sexual power and autonomy. A woman must regard herself as a sexual creature. She must be able to freely enjoy the sensuous pleasures of the flesh. She must feel completely in control of her sex life, not driven by obligation to perform sexual acts.

I relish the thought of giving head, particularly to a rock-hard, freshly showered cock. I begin to salivate just at the thought of taking my lover's cock in my mouth, slowly making love to it until the motions of my lips and tongue drive him to explode.

If you like what you read....email me....lets make it happen!!!!!

Let me be your sweet indulgence

An oatmeal cookie filled with nutty tidbits

Or maybe a frosted orange cupcake

I could be a creamy chocolate milkshake

Or even a tempting apple tart.

The choice is yours: come eat me

I'll be anticipating thy luscious lips

As they close around me in sweet desire

Tasting my goodness with an eager tongue

Oh! What a sweet feeling you give me!

It was a Saturday night, and I was alone.

A few years ago I would have been frantically calling people trying to find somewhere to go and something to do, but I guess the years changed that. Tonight, especially, the silence and break from humanity was a blessing. After fixing a dinner and cleaning up, I felt a calm take over my body and looked forward to simply being with my thoughts for the evening.

I love my apartment. When I rented it, I said, "The higher the better." I was on the 9th floor - not the penthouse by a long shot, but up high enough where the rest of the world was at a distance. Even though windows surrounded my apartment, the view was not spectacular as my building was surrounded by other buildings, but it still had that "Up On The Roof" feel to it.

I put on a bunch of C.D's, turned all the lights down, lit one candle on the end table next to my favorite place to sit, and poured a glass of Merlot. I undressed and put on a light robe and snuggled into my corner of the couch.

I sat there for a few minutes, lost in my thoughts and the music, sipping leisurely at the wine. I suddenly noticed that in the building across from me, a couple had entered an apartment and turned on all the lights. I had seen her before and knew that she lived there alone. I could not take my eyes off of the two of them. She looked coy and confident. He had a confident appearance, and it looked as though he was very taken with her. As I watched them this Saturday evening, I saw her turn to her "date" and fall into his arms, kissing him deeply. I watched his arms engulf her body. I stared as his hands roamed over her back and caressed her body. I could almost hear the muffled moans and heavy breathing.

I shifted my position.

She broke the kiss and hurried to the windows to pull the shades, but he came up behind her and pressed her against the window. He leaned over to whisper something in her ear. She peered out into the night, seemed satisfied that no one was watching, and nodded. His mouth found her neck. I watched her reach around to bring his hands to her breasts. I knew that she could feel him pressing between the cheeks of her ass. Her breath on the window formed a temporary fog that momentarily blocked my view.

The belt of my robe came loose.

He pulled her back from the window. I saw her mouth open as his hands kneaded her body. They slid down from her breasts to her stomach and disappeared into her slacks. She leaned her head back, and I felt the hot air he breathed into her ear. She placed her hands on his hips and began a slow dance against his body, moving up and down while pushing against him, rubbing what I knew to be a hot and straining cock.

I put the cool glass of wine against my nipple.

His hand moved down inside her pants. I saw the intake of breath and knew that her apartment was filled with the moans that she emitted. He brought his hand up to her mouth and whispered something to her. She took his fingers into her mouth and sucked her own taste from them, closing her eyes. The affect made him close his eyes and savor the feeling of her lips and tongue drawing his fingers in. He slowly removed his wet fingers and allowed them to trail down her chin and massage her throat. Then he began to undress her.

My hand moved down my body as I spread my legs.

He slowly unbuttoned her blouse, softly caressing her breasts through the fabric. Her hands went to the button on her pants and undid it, sliding the zipper down. He pulled the blouse down her shoulders and arms, and I felt her shiver. Her pants fell to the floor. She was wearing a lacy black bra and panties. She stepped out of her slacks, and he turned her around to face him. His hands delicately traced her form - down her arms and over her waist. His fingers pulled the top of her bra down, and he bent down to taste her nipple. It looked as though her legs lost their strength because she grabbed him to steady herself. His hands reached around and unfastened her bra, and it fell to the floor.

I was so wet.

He held her tightly as his mouth kissed and sucked and pulled on her breasts. I could see her chest expanding and contracting with her hard breathing and her mouth moving as I guessed she told him how good it felt. He slowly lowered himself to the floor in front of her and slid her panties down her legs slowly. Her hands grabbed his head and pulled him into her. I could feel his tongue darting out to taste her. I could feel his five o'clock shadow grazing her skin.

I let my fingers play over my body.

I watched his head move into her as he licked her. I saw his hands move up behind her and his fingers dig into her cheeks, pulling her hard against his mouth. Her own hands moved up to cup her breasts and pinch her nipples. As I watched, I saw her breathing increase in speed and intensity. I knew she was reaching orgasm.

I set my drink down and spread my legs further, feeling between my lips.

Her hands gripped his shoulders as she came hard. He continued to lick her during her spasms until she backed away from him and pulled him up from the floor. They both struggled with his clothes. When he was free of them, he took her by the shoulders and backed her up against the wall.

My fingers slid in and out of me, brushing my clit with each stroke.

He pushed her against the wall. He forced her legs apart and brought both of her wrists up over her head, pinning them against the wall. With his other hand, I knew that he grasped his cock to enter her. I saw him move quickly and deeply into her. Moving faster. I felt the ecstasy she must have been feeling. I watched him move in and out of her - slowly at first, then faster and faster. I could feel her body being pushed against the wall. I felt the restraint on her wrists.

An orgasm rose within me.

Maybe she hurt, but I knew that she loved it as he shoved himself into her. He suddenly dropped her wrists and grabbed her shoulders. He moved hard and fast... I knew he had lost himself in his passion. She grabbed him and clawed his back. He froze against her, and I knew he had exploded inside her.

I closed my eyes and moaned.

When I opened my eyes, the two of them had collapsed to the floor, their bodies entwined. I waited until my breathing had returned to normal, then reached over, blew out the candle, and sat in total darkness with the strains of soft, romantic music in my ears.

When he came in, we immediately embraced and started kissing and groping each other He grabbed my ass and I began stroking his hard cock through his pants. We discussed sex ideas and decided we were going to have oral sex and just oral sex.

We undressed and he was going to start by getting me off ~ but I pushed him back on the bed. His cock was straight up in the air as I crawled over to it and took it in my hand. I started stroking it up and down ~ I was stroking the full length of his shaft. I stroked him hard and fast and then started licking the tip of his dick.

I licked it as thought it were an iced cream cone, then put it in my mouth and swallowed. I took his whole cock and gave him some great deep throat action. He held my head in place and I sucked it up and down. My head was bobbing back and forth. As I sucked his cock, I looked up and smiled.

"Oh yeah baby that feels so good", he moaned as his cock became even more hard and erect in my mouth. I could feel that he was going to come and he began fucking my mouth with his cock. I sucked even harder and faster. Suddenly he pulled out and came all over my tits, face and hair.

He then laid me on the bed, opened my legs and buried his face between them. His mouth and tongue were working all of my sensitive parts. He grabbed my breast and started playing with my nipples.

He took a vibrator from my drawer and put it inside me. He kept putting it deeper and deeper. As I started to scream that I was going to come, he removed the vibrator and started working on me with that talented tongue again. I screamed hard as he licked me clean.

I was to be the main entertainer at a bachelor party.

There were only three guys there ~ what could happen?

I arrived and they offered me a glass of wine. Since I hadn't eaten all day, the wine immediately went to my head. These men were very muscular. One in particular was a bit scruffy and older than I, but this older man's appeal was undeniable.

I was feeling heady and began fantasizing about each of these men and what it would be like to be with them. We began to taking off our clothes and I started kissing each of them. One leaned over and started kissing me and soon I felt another pair of hands on me and realized that the second man was caressing me from behind.

Before long I felt the third man's tongue in my ear. Each of them took me several times, and sometimes one of them took me from the front while the other one took me from behind and the third one watched.

We went all night, and as the sun rose, I felt both pain and satisfaction. I spent the whole next day craving the feel of those three men all at once.

I had anticipated seeing this gentleman.

His letters to me were exciting. I met him at the door. "Kelly", he said as he walked into the room, "This is going to be my first time with an escort.

All his pent-up sexuality was boiling over the top. Even as the words were coming out of his mouth, he had pushed me up against the wall and was roughly fondling my breasts through my bra. He bruised my lips with his impassioned kisses.

"I can't even make it to the bed," he panted, as he pulled me down onto the floor with him. And suddenly, I realized I wanted it just as much as he did.

I was tearing his clothes and my mouth found its way to his manhood. There was such need and want and power. He was harder than I'd ever seen or felt anyone before. And by this point he was begging me to let him inside me. In the tussling, we'd gotten my clothes off, but I still had on my lacy, white lingerie. I laid on top of him as I slid the panties off. He tried to roll over on top of me, but I said, "No, just because it's our first time together it doesn't mean I don't want to be on top. I want to see your face when you cum. Let's do this my way." And his face told me he couldn't take much more waiting, so I grabbed him in my hand and slid down on top of his pulsing shaft.

Of course, we were in the heat of passion, so there was no slow ride to the top. Almost instantly we were grinding full force and going as hard and fast as we could. We were both screaming out. I was sure the people next door could hear us. He exploded inside me. It was the most intense thing I'd ever felt, or so I thought. But then he said, "You didn't get to finish all the way, darling. Let me take you further."

As I lay there on the floor, he went across the room and got the chilled bottle of champagne that I had waiting for us. First he rolled the smooth, cold bottle over my clitoris, driving me wild with anticipation. Then he popped the top off the bottle and poured the champagne all over me. I started shivering with chills until he laid his hot mouth on my sweet spot and breathed onto me.

Before I knew it, his tongue was going mad as he licked the champagne off of me. And he did take me further. All the way to the big O. And again and again. By the time we were finished, we were so tired all we could do was lay on the floor touching each other.

A Wonderful Experience

He came to visit me and told me he needed a shower. I asked him if I could join him. I was such a good girl as we were in the shower, but, as we started to towel each other off, we stopped several times to embrace. Passion was building in both of us. I ran my hand along the stiffening shaft of his cock.

"I see someone's ready", I said as I grabbed his nearly erect cock and playfully led him towards the bedroom.

I sat him down at the edge of the bed, and with a little push, he flopped onto his back. I knelt between his legs and began to lick the shaft of his hard, erect cock. My tongue moved to the flared knob and began to swirl around the sensitive ridge. Stopping to lick quickly at the "v" shaped groove at the bottom. The groans I was eliciting from him urged me on. I licked down his veined shaft to his loosely hanging balls, sucking each one individually into my mouth. With one hand stroking his shaft and knob, I used my free hand to lift his bag and the underside down to the sensitive area of shin between his balls. The slight musky, heady, aroma filed my nostrils.

I love the smell of a man.

My tongue roamed back to the velvety knob and her tongue swirled the tip. The oozing pre cum at the slit told me he was too aroused for further stimulation, and I ran my tongue up the length of his belly to his nipples. I nipped and nibbled at each one, his returning sighs urging me.

He slid full length onto the bed as I continued to follow and nibble on his nipples. I then began to run my tongue back down his belly. Turning, I lifted my leg across his chest to straddle him. I positioned my moist, fully aroused pussy directly in his face, to receive the attention I desired.

He obliged by beginning to lick the full length of my pussy. I arched my back and pressed my now sodden pussy directly toward his exploring tongue. I moaned softly as his tongue moved across my outer lips.

His relentless tongue, delving deep into me, then flicking between the outer folds of my aroused pussy, was intensifying my arousal. I felt an intense orgasm welling deep in my core, as I ground against him, directing his licking to the most intensely sensitive areas of my pussy. I felt the delicious pressure of his lubricated thumb, pressing against my anus, and with a slight push it entered my tight puckered hole. The sensation of a finger in my ass drove me over the edge, and my orgasmic contractions began. He gently licked the hood of my retracted clit as the pulsations began to subside. As the contractions of my anus on his thumb ebbed, with a slow deliberate movement, he slowly pulled it from me. I wilted on top of him and my ass rested on his chest.

I'm All Yours

I'm all yours tonight.

Pleasure me in every way you can possibly think of.

Pleasure

Tiny streams of water flow over my body.

I feel your hands and follow them, feeling them drape over my sensual breasts.

I pause and sense your hardness growing, pushing lightly inside me.

Steam rises, filling the room with anticipation.

I gaze into your eyes, I grasp you tightly and urge your swelling cock.

The water's warmth penetrates our skin helping build our erotic tensions.

Our tongues dance and we ascend upwards towards our destiny; you reach slowly further down between my legs.

You reach slowly, further down between my legs. You feel for my swollen folds and return our moistened hand to your lips.

You toss your head back in pure extacy and my heavenly scents fill your mind.

We smile and we shall quench our thirsts in worlds of endless pleasure.

I locked the door as he sighed with relief. He had told me that he had a 10-hour day and several cans of Coke. He was aching with tension.

"Now kiss me", he said.

My mouth enveloped his as I was unbuttoning my shirt.

He pulled away from me and said, "Let me shut off the lights. How would it look if those people in the apartment building across the street saw us?

"They'd be jealous," I said, "especially if they knew all the nasty things I'd been planning, waiting for you to show up in those sexy black slacks, wanting that granite dick - "

Off came the lights.

My barbarous kiss equaled the urgency of my hands, as I jerked off his shirt, and unzipped his jeans. I cupped his balls before circling my fingers around his incipient erection.

Guiding his hand under my black skirt, I pressed his hand against my wet undies. His other hand gently massaged my roused nipples.

I ground myself against his hand. "Finger fuck me." I breathed hotly into his ear as I nibbled at his ears and neck.

Sliding his hand into my soaking pussy, he alternated between flirting with my clit and fucking me with three fingers.

I groaned animalistic, pumping my thighs more vigorously. My hands, one pinching, flicking his nipples, the other stroking his raging erection, drove him over the precipice.

He came, staining my shirt, neck and face with his seed and tension.

Withdrawing his fingers from my pussy, I gasped.

"Now look what you've done. My shirt is stained. If I take it off, promise not to take advantage of me?"

An apology was forming on his lips when I kissed him; tasting himself, he smiled as he resumed the former pace of his finger fuck.

I softly pushed his face towards my belly.

Without speaking, he unzipped my skirt while I took off my shirt and bra.

"Lick my outer lips. I love it when you do that.

I bucked as he gently, then roughly, traced my labia with his tongue. Crazed with slow-mounting ecstasy my fingers raked his dark unruly curls.

His fingers stroked the flesh around my thighs, belly and breasts. When he licked that spot he knew I loved . . . my hisses became full-fledged groans.

I came several minutes later.

Who Are You?

You are a professional with many responsibilities and an image to maintain and you seek a strong, intelligent creative woman to build a fantasy world of words and sounds around you for a delicious, luxurious span of time, a sensual, creative fantasy landscape in which you can loose yourself, escape the day, release the stresses that make your muscles tense, your mind race.

Are you looking for a Courtesan, a girlfriend, a dirty girl? Perhaps you are not sure what you seek ~ but would love to find a woman who can offer you a buffet of arousing erotic choices.

You seek a parter in exploration. You seek a strong, wise and knowledgeable lover, a temptress to entice, to guide you through the dark corners, the back alleys, the secret rooms and deep recesses of this irresistible land of fantasy.

I want to accompany you on this journey of erotic fantasy. I am intelligent and creative, superior yet approachable. I use words, hands and imagination to release the tension from your body and mind. I am an exotic adviser, confidant and experienced in the art of physical and mental sexual arousal and fulfillment.

I am lying here thinking about you and this intense hunger for you is in my loins.

I imaging you and I together in a room somewhere where we can't get enough of each other. I let my hands caress your face as you suck on my breasts. The feeling is wonderful ~ I touch your body and I feel you trembling with passion. I can't get enough of you.

You move to my wet, throbbing, aching cunt and you suck my clit with deep urgency. I am going fucking crazy. I get that feeling again in my toes and it's coming up my body ~ but I'm not ready to cum yet.

I pull you up from between my crotch and I kiss your mouth and then gently move down your body. I gently kiss your nipples and suck on them for a while. I kiss your chest and move down to your loins where I gently put your hard cock in my mouth. I hear you moan as I suck your dick. You moan as I suck on your balls. I swallow your juices because I want to keep everything for myself.

You are so fucking sweet, I'm going crack for you. I put my foot on your shoulder and beg you to fuck me hard. I need you so badly, and from somewhere deep in the recesses of my mind, I hear you groan, and I know I am going to have your sweet cum inside me. I beg you to cum in my and your body tightens and this wonderous feeling comes over me ~ I am cumming.

I feel the emotions coming through me ~ O God you are just so fucking hot.

We are spent and we snuggle up together and I smile and kiss you. I turn over and drift off into sleep land with a contented smile on my face.

My Needs

Many people ask me what I need, want and crave. That is a tough question and I am an unsettled, yearning, sensual and intelligent woman.

My needs change day-to-day. But I shall try my best to answer this question honestly.

When I was just a sweet, innocent girl, I spent hours dreaming of my perfect Prince Charming on his magnificent white steed, carrying me off through cotton candy skies up to "Happily-Every-After-Land", where a wondrous ice castle in the clouds awaited my delighted pleasure, so priceless and precious this dream. Purity, virtue, love at first sight, all are ethics of youth. My, how naive and simple I was to dream like this.

Well into years of sophistication and enlightenment, these schoolgirl fantasies fossilized. Innocence is no longer a luxury, but a tangibility, collecting mold in some second hand rose store, Today, my ripened erotic intellect craves succulent sensual equality.

Prince Charming's dashing influence is now one dimensional compared to the whole essence of a totally captivating man, who is 3-D in vivid living color; a devilish find as rare as an enticing blue moon. These carnal journeys he, my sensualist and I, his equal, will lavish together in perfect heavenly bliss, project a kaleidoscope of emotions and desires that my pigtailed, peppermint candied, eyelet laced, puppy love fancies never accomplished or imagined, even in my wildest dreams.

This type of romance or meeting of our erotic auras is what I am craving, what I need and what will make me happy. I believe that YOU could qualify for the role of my spiritual, emotional and physical soul mate. YOU possess these talents that I mentioned above. I would like to embark upon a sensual pleasure-seeking voyage with YOU.

Come, do not be frightened.

Let us begin.

Do You Believe In Santa?

As a tyke I remember Santa Claus and the big to do at Christmas. Maybe it was more important back then...today the affluence and indifference of our modern angst has probably diminished both Christmas' and Santa's influence.

If marketers in fact invented Santa then they did one heck of a job. From the earliest times I could remember 'what is Santa bringing you this year' or 'did you write Santa a letter yet? 'Have you been a good little girl this year?' My relationship with Mr. Claus was certainly not atypical of my time and space; all the other kids bought into the same argument. I also understood that Santa's gig was unconditional and even if I had done a few naughty things he would most likely overlook them. Ho, Ho, Ho...which if we are to understand, means something totally different now.

As I got a little more world wise and got out and about, especially starting to play with other kids and go into their homes and see whole new families, I began to wonder. Some of the kids said Santa was a fairy tale and others said their parents didn't believe in Santa so they didn't either. Others said it was stupid to write a letter to Santa because parents buy the gifts anyway.

Not believe in Santa? Not write the obligatory wish list? My God! As a four year old it was hard to imagine how anyone could not like the guy...what was there not to like? But there were always those smart aleck kids that would say things like 'since we don’t have a fireplace, is Santa going to leave us out?'

Of course not I would reply defending his scruples, Santa didn't leave anybody out. Santa was an equal opportunity distributor. But there was something fishy as the evidence slowly came in that it was in fact mom and dad who went to the store and bought the gifts; not Santa making them up at the North Pole with a bunch of elves and delivering them in an anti-gravity delivery sleigh.

Then, like millions of other baby boomer kiddies, I came to the stark and unbelievably cruel conclusion that Santa did not exist. Upset and shattered, I cried to mom that it looks like my man Santa was a cruel hoax hoisted on me by those that thought it funny to tell little kids lies. Oh, cruel world!

Thank goodness for mom. Had it not been for her I would have lost all faith in humanity for ever right then and there and become a hardened cynic. Creating something like Santa and then taking him back, especially from four year olds, just did not seem like the American thing to do. It wasn't fair play.

It was clear to me back then that little babies came into the world not knowing anything and pretty much everything they know is taught to them by their loving families. Why would these loving families tell them such a lie?

Mom finally confirmed the news that Santa did not come down the heater vent. In fact, Santa did not bring any of my presents. People invented Santa because they needed him and needed to believe in something like Santa. It was a nice story in the old days and we keep telling it today; sort of make believe to make us feel good.

Whew. Thank goodness for mom setting Santa straight for me. I was beginning to wonder if I was wrapped right which is a bit much for a four year old that has just started to get out into the world.

Things changed with my kids. By the time they came along everything was hip and cool and Santa was becoming even more popular. But my kids never came and asked was Santa real. They knew the answer already.

Sure the concept of Santa has changed over the years. The sheer amount of commercialism has made even Santa a bit trying at times. Santa as a concept sort of faded into the background as I raised a family and traveled the world.

A Santa concept. Hmmm...

The latest brain research lends great credence that concepts created by the mind can in fact become the mind's reality. Hmm... Does that mean that if the concept is accepted by the mind it in fact becomes reality? Depending on which cognitive behavioral expert you ask, the answer is a 'probably so'.

So at this point, Virginia, we can say that Santa probably exists, at least in some people's psyches. That is a big step up from sheer myth and fantasy. If people way back created Santa because they needed him maybe we can do the same. And maybe we need to.

So here Virginia I have evolved full circle from total belief, shocked disbelief, reality assessment, and on to conceptual integration and assimilation. Or something like that.

Maybe it's the crazy idea of some gone cat unconditionally handing out toys to every kid in the whole wide world. Maybe it's the hope that someone like Santa could do such deeds and not have a hidden agenda or secret business plan.

Yes Virginia, Santa exists in the frontal lobes and cerebrum of every child that lets him go there. So don't forget to write your letter to Santa and hang your stocking near the heater vent. And don't feel badly when your insensitive intellectual friends make fun of you for believing in fairy tales.

Just tell them fairy tales are culture and culture is us. Rest assured that our dear friend Santa Claus will always exist as long as we need him to.

Ho, Ho, Ho!

An Ode To Soap Operas

You have got to love soap operas. From the intricate plots and finely woven webs of deceit, to the depths of schemes, they were, are and always will be classics. They are timeless. I remember Luke and Laura being on the run, I remember being a kid and watching Dark Shadow’s with my mom. Watch a few soap operas for the next few days and see for yourself how closely they resemble the soap operas of 36 years ago...

And now for that thought provoking question that plagues men’s souls unceasingly through the bright shining of the day and through the untold dark depths of the night:


Why did Peter, who in reality is actually Superman, fake that he stubbed his toe on the 17th stone on the sidewalk starting at 4th and Grand instead of the 16th stone, which was bigger and more logically the victim of that invulnerable toe and why did Marly take Sam’s advice to buy the yellow tulip instead of the red and green carnation, while all the time Rodriguez knew that the curvaceous young Pandora was at the moment buying the last purple, double-breasted, duck-billed, warbling giraffe in the world for her dear departed Phillip disguised as a lowly second mate on the Queen Mary, which was under attack by the tyrant Cedric because of the terrible beating he had suffered at the hands of Radcliff whose ex-wife Natalie was actually Percival’s long lost great-great-uncle Maximillian in disguise who knew that Zigmond was fond of un-pitted olives stuffed into green grapefruit filled graciously with Granny and Gretchen’s goulash, which was gradually getting gooey and who also knew of Jennifer’s contact Louella in the deep Congo, seized at the time by the dread Gardenia, the 7th cousin of Guenivere, in hopes of receiving the eight-ounce bottle of Elmer’s Glue stored in the vast files in the cortex of Courtney’s colossal computer complex carefully compiled to correct the current curling, commonly crusading as the contagious, communicable, crystalline, cucumber crud, carried on cue sticks by crying cuckoo clock birds continuously to conform with the cunning Cornelius? cumbersome plot to corrupt the currency and continue the crisis of the Cormandel Coast Cult, complicated by the coroner Cort’s corny connotation to conceal his consecutive coronary contractions constantly crippling his conscious efforts to contradict congenial counterparts? careful counterfeit correspondence with Corwyn, the cosmic cosmetician?

Was it because Bill had green eyes or was it because Melissa meddled menacingly and meticulously in Maude’s plans to read the calendar to see what year she had been sent to by her superiors in the future?

You know you are a chocoholic if....

Are you a chocoholic? Answer these questions to help find out.
chocoholic (def): a person who has or claims to have an addiction to chocolate
If you have more than 2 secret stashes of chocolate candy, you might be a chocoholic. (Be honest.)

* If your top 3 favorite candies all have chocolate in them, you might be a chocoholic.

* If you have more than 4 books at home on chocolate, you might be a chocoholic.

* If your favorite dessert is chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and chocolate ice-cream on the side, then you might be a chocoholic.

* If you name chocolate as one of the seven wonders of the world, you might be a chocoholic.

* If you bookmark more than 2 websites on the health benefits of chocolate, then you might be a chocoholic.

* If your favorite movie is Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, you might be a chocoholic.

* If you own more than one chocolate-related T-Shirt, you might be a chocoholic. (If you actually wear that chocolate T-Shirt in public, just admit it. You are a chocoholic.)

* If you name your first-born child after your favorite chocolate candy - then you are a definite, full fledged chocoholic.

* If you are a chocoholic, there you may want to try one of two possible cures:

CURE #1: Chocolate Overdose

In several cases a chocolate overdose will effectively kill your chocolate bug for a period of time. At some point, too much chocolate in a given month will cure your addiction - for at least a week. Your personal chocolate overdose limit will depend on your level of addiction.

CURE #2: Chocolate Substitution

Chocolate substitution is another option, if the chocolate overdose doesn't work. It involves starving your chocolate bug by offering it wholesome candy substitutes. The concept is that your body will gradually forget its craving for chocolate. (We sell a variety of delicious candies to help you do this in style.)

If one of these cures doesn't work, well, at least you would enjoy the attempt . . .

By the way, here are some great links on the health benefits of chocolate. You may want to bookmark them in case someone tries to convince you that chocolate is not good for you.

* http://www.momscape.com
* http://www.aphrodite-chocolates.co.uk
* http://www.chinesefood.about.com

Well, of course it makes sense that chocolate really is healthy. Chocolate is made from a bean - and so, wouldn't that be like eating a vegetable? (Try explaining that to your mom.)